It was bound to happen ~ because she has 3 brothers, I was bound to have a little Diva on my hand.  That is not to say that she can't handle herself...because she can...but my, oh my, am I in trouble.

Today my little Diva turned 4.  You should have seen her face when Mrs. S put her birthday crown on at school.  She was beaming!  She was so excited to have the focus on her and be the center of attention on her special day at school.

We are celebrating with parties all weekend - but had donuts and cupcakes and sang at Nana's tonight anyway!  :)

Danika with Nate on their first day of school this year

Danika at her Christmas Party at school

Daddy's girl

Dear Danika,


     Today is your 4th birthday and I feel like I wrote you a letter just last night about your 3rd birthday!  You have grown so much in the last year and continue to amaze me.  You have become such a little lady and would wear dresses 24/7 if I let you.  You would also start wearing make-up and probably be the one to drag me out the door to get our hair done and mani/pedis!  I look forward to those days ~ but I'm also enjoying the right now, where Mommy taking 10 minutes to paint your nails means you are the perfect little princess.


     You are an amazing big sister.  You are always looking out for your little brothers and hate to hear them cry or be upset.  You are the first one to try to calm them down and always ask me if they are okay even after they have stopped crying.  


     You are also an amazing little sister.  I can't believe how you put up with Nate sometimes.  He can push your buttons for sure - but you always go right back to giving him that unconditional love and forgiving him no matter what.  I hope that it is always that way!  


     I am looking forward to so many things that you will start to enjoy and be doing.  Nate is starting to get involved in things that Daddy likes - but I get to show you all the things I liked when I was little.  I was thrilled when you said you wanted to have a Strawberry Shortcake party because that is right out of my childhood!


     Your teachers all love you and tell me what a perfect angel you are in school.  They tell me all the time that you love to sing and I believe it because you taught your baby brother, Dean, how to sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.  When we had our parent/teacher conference with your teacher, she couldn't say enough good things about you and what a big help you are to your teachers.  


     You can be a handful at times when you are at home - but I would worry if you weren't.  I'm so glad you are who you are and I can't wait to continue on this journey with you to discover who you will become.


I love you,


Mommy

Things have been going really well. Much better than usual, in fact. I have some ideas as to why ~ which I will share in a minute ~ but it makes me a little nervous because, well...I'm a pessimist at heart.  I try - believe me I try - to not think that way, but if things start going really smooth or really well I tend to brace myself for some bump in the road, minor (or sometimes major) catastrophe...in other words, I wait for complications or issues or anything that will take this nice and easy pace I'm going at and throw it into a tailspin.  Yep ~ I'm a pessimist.

That all being said - here's what has been working for me the past week or so.

First of all, I've been doing FlyLady a lot more frequently...in fact ~ I would say I'm using routines and schedules everyday.  With routines and schedules come a little bit of peace ~ I know what should be happening when and I'm prepared for what is coming up next.  A big PLUS is that my house is actually kind of ... clean!  I knew having a clean house (with as little clutter visible as possible with 4 kids under 5) made Jerry a lot happier...a lot less stressed.  I didn't realize, though, that I would feel a lot less stress, too!  That I would actually feel more at peace and that having less mess and clutter just made me want to keep cleaning!  Funny how that goes, eh?

One problem with that is. . . well, it's left me a lot less time to do things I really enjoy that aren't necessarily things that are productive.  Like...ahem...blog, read blogs, get on facebook, sign on to TweetDeck - heck, I've had my laptop OFF for the last 2 days...and it's been pretty nice.  I missed it though ~ so, I'm going to have to find a way to squeeze it into my schedule without messing up my schedule.  I'm seriously contemplating waking up an hour early (which would be about 6 am) so that I can have an hour online before my day "starts"...

I also bought a new dry erase calendar ~ totally inspired by my friend Christina.


And a new set of shelves for the basement ~ it took the place of 2 VERY cluttered and overflowing cabinets...which in turn was able to free up space to organize more things!



My husband is a real trooper because all this energy and cleaning and organizing has cause projects galore for him!  Sunday involved him tackling this baby:




While I worked on my Control Journal!  I had the same routines written down that I had before the twins were born and obviously some things have changed.

So ~ there you have it.  I feel like some kind of switch has been flipped...or I finally woke up or something.  I feel like I've finally realized that this is what I should be doing.  I look at my mother and my mother-in-law and wonder if this happened to them, too.  I admire both of them so much because they get things done.  They don't complain and they don't take a break (at least not a long one) from doing things.  I'm wondering if they hit a point like I'm at right now where they realized that things go smoother and work out better if you just keep at it...just keep moving.  Don't wait or put it off...it's just easier if you take the 10 or 15 minutes to do it right now.

I guess I may still be a pessimist, but it looks like my procrastinating ways are OVER!  :)  There may be hope for me to turn to optimism after all!  I mean - look at these kiddos...they look optimistic, don't they?







 

I woke up at 7:15 this morning with a blog post forming in my head.  I was going to tell you, in some witty way, about all the emotions that I experienced yesterday – it was a roller coaster kind of day.  Since it is now two hours later, dear internet, and you have sucked up my entire morning, I will have to just do the quick rendition of the whole thing.

I had a lump in my throat for about an hour and a half yesterday – I guess it wasn’t an hour and a half solid, but it was on and off for that long.  You see…yesterday was Nate’s last “regular” day of 3-year-old preschool.  This had me choked up for a few reasons…but it all comes back to the fact that my kids are getting bigger – they are growing up.  I was Nate’s teacher this year – although if you ask him he will probably name every other person who had anything to do with preschool this year…the wonderful women that are aids in the classroom (He LOVES his Mrs. Henry and Mrs. Schwartz!) or the subs that have been in the room at various times (He always talks about Mrs. Merrick and the things she would like when we see them – for example, when we were reading a book from the library the other day he said, “Mommy, I bet Mrs. Merrick would like to see this book.”)  But technically, I was Nate’s teacher this year and yesterday was the last day before our program/graduation next week. 

While we were practicing for the program yesterday, Nate caught my eye and I was his Mommy for a moment, not his teacher.  I sat watching my 4-year-old son sing his little heart out…it kind of sucked…I had to swallow pretty hard in order to not have to explain to 14 darling 3 and 4-year-olds why their teacher was crying.  I did it…but it happened 3 more times that day before we got home and the chaos that is my house prevented me from thinking about it again ~ until now.

Next year, Nate will be with his Mrs. Merrick in the 5-day class.  Danika will be in the other 3-year-old class ~ because I think she will do much better without me to cling to all the time.  Who knows what I’ll do with the twins when their time comes…but I know that this could very well be the only time I had one of my kiddos in my class.  It’s an interesting experience to see them in that setting.  I’m glad I had the chance to do it.  Next year, though, I get to go through the experience from the other side.  The expereince of “giving” my children to other people for a few hours a week…letting other people take care of them…letting other people be important parts of their lives. 

I get it now and I’m sure I’ll get it even more next year.  I get why the beginning of the year is so tough for parents…why they want to walk their kiddos in and peek at them through the windows.  Why they ask so many questions that border on personal but are really just questions that help them understand, know and trust the person who will be responsible for their baby for however long they are in our care.  I know the women who will be with my children (and they are all wonderful) and for most or part of the time my children are there I will be in the building – it still makes my chest a little tight and my throat close up…my eyes water because I won’t be right next to them if they need me.

Please, don’t think I’m not going to be able to handle this.  I’ll totally be fine.  In fact, once it starts I’ll probably enjoy a little bit of a routine and a little break from 4 kids every morning!  Plus, I’m not completely ruling out the possibility that PMS has something to do with this feeling right now.  It’s also probably in part due to the fact that I’ve been oddly aware of how wonderful my children are at the age they are right now.  My mother is good for the, “This is such a nice age” comment and I know what she means – although, I’m not looking forward to finding out about the no-so-nice ages that are in the future.

So ~ I have to just share some pictures with you and let you know about my wonderful friend, Erin!  Erin and I met through the book club I’m in that meets once a month.  We started talking through facebook and then started going to Mommy Group meetings together.  We are a lot alike – we both have quite a few kids and we are both super busy.  Erin LOVES to stamp – and she’s really really good at it, too!  I mentioned on her blog once that I liked the recipe boxes she had made.  So, she made me one for my birthday!  She gave it to me yesterday, so I just have to share some pictures!

Here’s a picture of the top of the box – she did a garden theme because she had read that Jerry and I like to garden!
 
This is the front of the box – isn’t it ADORABLE!?!
She made it big so that I could fit a full size sheet of paper in it!  Which is awesome because most of my recipes come from allrecipes.com or magazines!

Here’s the inside tabs –

And this is her “stamp” on the back!


Too cute, right?  I’m planning on filing and filling it up later today.  I’m so excited about it!  It’s beautiful and I can’t wait to find the perfect place to show it off in my kitchen!
Thanks again, Erin!

That's how I'd rank this haircut.  A 7.5 out of 10 - with 1 being the worst haircut I have ever had in my entire life (think short hair, perm and crazy short bangs teased to the tippy top) and 10 being an unrealistic haircut that I've always dreamed of having (think Meg Ryan in City of Angels).  So really, 7.5 is pretty darn good.  Plus, I haven't washed and styled it myself, yet...so there is the possibility I will like it even more once I've had time to play around with it.  You wanna see it?  I know...I know...of COURSE you do - but . . . you see . . . I don't like pictures of me.  Oh...okay...geeze - here is 1 out of the 50 I took trying to find one that I liked. (BTW -  I don't like it either, but I was starting to get a little tired of trying)


I'm not even sure you can see my haircut...but oh well...I like it and I'm sure that a non-posed picture of me will end up on here at some point that will show it off better. 

Okay - onward...I have about 6 topics for blogs running around in my head...and I can't pick one.  However, I really don't feel like being serious today - as if my kissy-face picture didn't tip you off to that one - so I'm not going to write about anything too deep.  Let's talk about...TV.

What TV shows do you watch?  We watch:

Nurse Jackie - (Edie Falco is awesome)
United States of Tara (Toni Collette is AMAZING as Tara)
Dexter (although I very well may be tuning out because the ending devastated me last season)
Spartacus: Blood and Sand (yep...I'm admitting it...just don't tell anyone, ok?)
Glee (Did you see Neil Patrick Harris is on the next Glee?  YAY!!!)
Community (LOVE me some Joel McHale!)
and finally...the one that has consumed me for the past week...

Flash Forward

We watched the first half of the season telling ourselves that we weren't going to get into one of these shows that confuses you and doesn't give you any answers...but we couldn't stop watching. (me in part because I LOVE me some Joseph Fiennes - he had me since Shakespeare in Love) 

We had our DVR set to record it so we wouldn't miss any episodes...then the second half of this season started AFTER we switched to cable and never reset our DVR to tape it.  About 2 weeks ago, I was reading a friend's Facebook status about Flash Forward and it hit me!  We were about 8 episodes behind!  (this is where I tell you that I love the internet...because thanks to the internet I was able to catch up on all 8 episodes!)

So - we are now caught up and I'm kind of disappointed because now I have to wait every week like everyone else to find out what is going on. 

Can I tell you the best part about having to catch up on all of those episodes on our laptops?  I got to watch TV in bed with Jerry...we don't have a TV in our room and I'm not sure that I want one, but having a legit excuse to lay in bed, snuggled up next to my DH and watch some TV was kind of nice.

Okay - done rambling for now...but I would like to hear from you all.  Can you tell me what your favorite TV show is?  Do you watch any of the ones I watch?  Have a favorite episode?  Watch a lot of TV or are you too busy for it?  I can honestly say that if we didn't have the DVR and On-Demand we wouldn't watch anything but hockey!  hehehe

So ~ How was your Mother’s Day?  Let me show you what my loving hubby bought me for the special occasion…

Cute, right? There is one silhouette for each of my kiddos – with their birthday listed below.  At first, I thought it was a little bit too big because I’m not a big jewelry person.  But it grew on me and by the end of the day I was in love with it!  I’m already thinking about other charms I want to get to put on it…like a teaching one and maybe one for my anniversary!

All that being said – my Mother’s Day was kind of a rocky one emotionally.  I’m not sure exactly why, but I got myself into a bad place for about 45 minutes and had to force myself to snap out of it.  I’ve probably mentioned somewhere (but I’m too lazy to go find where) that I try very hard to be a positive person.  I try very hard not to complain too much about things.  I didn’t realize that trying that hard can sometimes catch up with you – but it did for me yesterday.  All the things I try not to worry about or complain about started to REALLY bother me.  They started to bother me so much I had to actually go up to my room and be alone for about 20 minutes so I could lose my composure and then regain it – something I just didn’t feel like doing in front of my kiddos.  I cried – not uncontrollably, but harder than I had in a while – and then I told myself that was it…it was time to go and enjoy my Mother’s Day. 

I have no real intention of getting into what I was upset about – except for one thing a little further down…but I do want to talk a little bit about my hubby’s reaction.  He didn’t know why I excused myself.  After all, I’m just getting over a stomach flu, so I’ve been running up the steps a lot lately!  We talked about it a little later, though, when we were riding home from my parents’ house.  I told him that I think trying to be so positive is starting to wear on me.  I told him about how I think that always trying to act like everything is okay is making me hold a lot more inside than I should be.  One of the problems, though, is that everything really is pretty much okay.  The things I would complain about aren’t really that big a deal when you look at other people’s problems.  However – they are my problems.  They are the things I have to deal with.  I mentioned that I maybe I should go find someone to talk to - you know, like a therapist, because I won't feel bad complaining to them because I'd be paying them to listen to me...all he said was, "Yeah - and they would probably say something back to you...cause I have no clue what to tell ya!"

Another issue with me complaining is that I really have a problem admitting that I have a problem.  I try very hard to do things on my own.  It comes from so many people telling me I’m going to need help – from so many people commenting on how full my hands must be – from so many people giving me a sympathetic look when they find out how many kids I have and how old they are – I want to prove them wrong for some reason.  I don’t like to admit that I don’t have it under control.  I don’t like to admit that I need help.  I don’t like to ask for help.  I desperately want to be able to go to the park with my four children all by myself…but it will never happen.  I know that I only have to ask and someone would be more than willing to go with me – so, yesterday, I decided I’m done feeling sorry for myself and going to quit being stubborn.  I’m going to *gulp* ask for help and ask other people into my life – realizing that they will see that I’m not perfect…but that’s okay, right?  I’m hoping that it will help me to feel less isolated – less like all I am is a mother.

Isn’t it funny that I would discover something like that on Mother’s Day – that I’m having an issue because I feel like I’m consumed with being a mother these days?  Of COURSE I’m consumed with it – I have 4 children who depend on me for pretty much every essential in life (although 2 out of 4 are potty trained – hang in there Christine!).  Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE being a mom…but for some reason I’m missing doing things for me.

So – I took a personal day from work yesterday.  Jerry is off and I’m going to get my haircut.  I think I want it to look something like this:

I know…it’s kind of a mom haircut!  However, I’ve been rocking the ponytail nonstop for about a month now…I need a change – and I’m hoping that this will force me to do my hair every day…and that will make me feel like getting out of the house, which will mean I will have to call someone to go with me!

Next, I’ve got to do something about my wardrobe.  If you pretty much wear XL clothes, where do you shop?  I’m planning on getting rid of a lot of my less comfortable clothes and getting myself some staples and starting my wardrobe over.  Let’s face it, pregnancy changes your body…unfortunately for me, mine isn’t bouncing back as quick from the twins as I would like.  I refuse to keep trying on the same clothes that make me look horrible hoping that they don’t look as bad today.  So – I need to make a list of essentials and sort of start over…ideas would be greatly appreciated because I hate to shop for clothes – fashion just really isn’t my thing.

I’m hoping that maybe next year I’ll be more together on Mother’s Day – I’m hoping that I might be able to look more like I want to look and feel more like I want to feel.  Yesterday was just a really off day for me.

In closing – do you have boys?  Do you have Geotrax?  We have a love/hate relationship with them around here.  They are fun and Nate and Danika will both play with them for hours…but they take up SO much space!  Exhibit A for Why We Need a Playroom!

 

I’m exhausted.  We have been so busy it is unreal.  On top of all of that, I’ve been trying to keep up with the Flylady stuff AND stay on track with my E-mealz…both of which are going very well (we had Creamy Roast Beef Pitas today – they weren’t bad at all…)  A lot of the E-mealz recipes are ones I can see myself adding things to so that they are more to our liking.  There have been a few of the meals that we have liked, but didn’t love just because it was missing something . . . so next time I make it I will add the missing ingredient.  The Flylady thing isn’t going as well as I would like…but I’m keeping afloat.  I haven’t been able to dive into my Zone cleaning quite yet, but I’m closer than I was when I started.  My goal is to get there the second week in June – that’s a full week after a full week of no work for me…that should help because Tuesdays throw me all off.  Jerry is home all day with the kids on Tuesday and he doesn’t Fly.  Not that I expect him to and not that it’s really a mess or anything when I get home, but my sink isn’t as clean as I would like it and for some reason the kids just aren’t as happy.  It’s because he’s NOT the Mama…which isn’t a bad thing, but I always feel like I’m paying for being away all day, even if it was for work and not fun.  Okay – so, my exhaustion is causing me to ramble…on with it already.

I started doing a Sunday Wrap-Up a while back and then just forgot about it…kind of like how I forgot to keep up with other Memes that I had been doing.  Anyway – this is going to be kind of Sunday Wrap-upish. 

Here’s a pic of my kiddos with my parents…it’s the last pic I have of the kids before the battery died in my camera (which is why you won’t see any other pictures from our fun filled weekend) 

Friday night ~ I had Mommy Group and the big kids stayed at my parents’ house.  I had a great time at Mommy Group . . . the ride down was a lot of fun, too. 

Saturday ~ The kiddos came home early afternoon.  That gave me time to get the newsletter for school done in the morning.  The twins were really well behaved and I even got a few loads of laundry done, too!

Saturday evening ~ Jerry went shopping all over the place for birthday gifts and groceries.  When he came home we ate and put the kids to bed…then we watched Funny People.  I have mixed feelings about it.  It wasn’t a bad movie and it wasn’t an awesome movie.  It was just an okay movie.  I guess I probably wouldn’t recommend that you watch it because if you hate it I don’t want you to blame me for wasting hours of your life…but if you do watch it, I’d be interested in hearing what you thought about it. 

Sunday ~ by far our busiest day of the weekend.  We started out at a part for our friend’s son, Ethan.  He was turning 3 and had his party at Giggles and Smiles.  Fun was had by all – especially me because those are some FAST slides.  I took my niece, Angelina, up with me and helped her go down them.  She gets nervous with heights and any kind of floor with holes in it.  So I basically threw her over the parts that made her nervous.  I was the only adult going down the slides, though – good thing or bad thing?  I think it’s one of the things that makes me love my job so much – I’m a big kid and enjoy playing more than most kids do.  :)

After that party, we had another birthday party to go to…this one was for Jerry’s grandmother.  She turned 94.  It was a great party – two disappointments, though.  1) The weather stunk and 2) the Penguins lost. 

Well – apparently, I’m not going to get to finish this post beyond this…and I’m not loving it anyway – so, I’ll just end it with a promise to write a better, more complete post in the future….hopefully after a good night’s sleep. 

I haven’t written a blog post since SUNDAY!  I think that’s the longest I’ve gone since having the twins…It’s not because I haven’t wanted to – I’ve just been too tired to do it.  I was more tired yesterday than I have been in a long time.  Not really for any reason I can pinpoint…but it’s not what you are thinking.  I’m not pregnant.  I’m NOT! 

 

Anyway…so another reason I haven’t written is because I’ve been busy.  More busy than  I have been in as long as I can remember.  The twins are eating 3 meals a day now…and feeding everyone (and cleaning up from all those meals) is really taking up a ton of time!  Not to mention planning for them…which is where E-Mealz comes in.  I mentioned it in my last blog post and said that I wanted to give it a fair chance before I told you all about it.  I read all of these reviews saying that it was the most wonderful thing in the world.  I wasn’t sold right away.  Here’s my honest review…good and bad.

 

First of all – I was introduced to E-Mealz by my cousin-in-law, Amy, when I was complaining about having to make a grocery list.  I can’t grocery shop without a list.  My mother very rarely followed a detailed grocery list – but she seemed like she was (and still is) stopping at the grocery store every other day.  I can’t do that.  I have trouble getting to the grocery store once a week!  

I love to cook.  I love cookbooks.  I love when my husband smiles at me and tells me something tastes better than his mom’s version.  (It’s happened twice – in the last 6 years!)  I don’t , however, love grocery shopping or menu planning or grocery list making.  So, Amy suggested I check out E-Mealz. 

My favorite part of E-Mealz is that the planning is done for you.  I still pick which of the meals I want to make on which day based on our schedules.  For example, I’m home all day today so I’m making Slow Roasted BBQ Chicken.  Every Wednesday, not only does E-Mealz give you the menu, it gives you the grocery list AND the recipe!  Plus, it all fits on 2 (or 1 front to back) sheets of paper!  The instructions are easy to follow and the grocery list is super easy to make sense of if you want to cook some meals but not others.

Now, the part I’m not so crazy about is the QUALITY of some of the meals.  Some of them have been really great – like the Breakfast Pizza and Bacon Cheese Strata.  However, some of them have been AWFUL or almost a joke when I think about having to feed 6 people someday.  Pepperoni Loaf for dinner?  Ham and Cheese Crescent Roll-ups, seriously?  The nights Jerry and I tried these they were SIDES to another meal…then again, we don’t eat lightly very often.

E-Mealz charged me $15.00 for the first 3 months of their service.  Dave Ramsey approves it as a way to help you save money…and I will say that (if you can stick to the list) it probably does help to cut down your grocery bill.  I use coupons in combination with E-Mealz and have been saving about 20% of my grocery bill every week.  They also have other plans that you can use.  We are trying the Any Store plan, because we shop at Giant Eagle and get fuelperks and get gas for our cars at GetGo to get foodperks.  However, they also have Wal-Mart (and other grocery stores, too) plans that matches the meals with their weekly specials to help you save even more money.  There are also plans if you are dieting or prefer vegetarian meals.  I can’t comment on the quality of these meals, because I’ve only used the Any Store plan.

So – here’s the bottom line…I like E-Mealz and will continue to use it until my 3 month subscription runs out…I’ll make a decision then if I want to continue or not.  If I had to decide right now, I would probably pay the $5.00 a month and keep trying it out.  It’s a lot more convenient, but with all of the Food, Inc. and Food Revolution talk I’m hearing (neither of which I have watched) I get nervous about what I am cooking with and feeding my children (so, just imagine if I HAD watched them!).

BTW – E-Mealz also has a referral plan…I’m not exactly sure how it works, but if you are thinking about giving it a try please click on that little banner up there on the left or one of the links in this post when you sign up.  It should give me credit for it then.  :)  (oh – and no one asked me to write this review or gave me any kind of compensation for it…I just did it all by myself!  Aren’t I special? hehehe)

No, really – I don’t complain much.  I firmly believe that if you complain you become more miserable.  If you just “suck it up” and do what needs to be done or fix what you can fix and put the things you can’t change in God’s hands then you will be much happier.  That’s not to say you will ALWAYS be happy – but I promise you will be HAPPIER than if you sit around and complain all day.

That being said, I would like to take this moment to ask reality to do me a huge favor…BACK OFF!!!

There are so many things creeping up in my near future that I have to deal with that I’m just feeling slightly panicked.  So ~ here’s my letter to reality…please indulge me and I promise I won’t make this a regular thing.

Dear Reality,

See these children?

Could you do me a favor and not let them grow up or change for the next 2 or 3 years?  I am so happy with the way they are right at this very moment and I’m not ready for them to change, yet.  I’m enjoying them the way they are and would appreciate it if they could stay this way for a while…after all, Dean has already lost his toothless grin with that one tooth popping up on the bottom.  Thanks to you, though, I’m not able to  just drop everything and just spend time with them and Jerry. So I can’t REALLY enjoy them the way I want to…

Also, I was talking to my dad yesterday about Jerry taking the boys hunting when they get older.  I told him that a freezer full of deer meat would be great – but my stomach does flips when I think of my boys out there with other hunters.  I told him that I just am not ready to think about the things I can’t protect them from, yet.  So – if you could just make people stop talking about things they will do that I don’t have control over, I would appreciate that, too.

Oh – and could you find a way to have someone knock on our front door and tell us they would like to buy our house for twice what it is worth AND that they have found the perfect 4 bedroom, 2 and 1/2 bath house in the best school district in the area, for tens of thousands less than we wanted to pay for it? Would it be pushing it to ask you to make sure it has huge walk-in closets in all 4 bedrooms and 1 in the hallway, too?

If it’s not too much trouble, could you get my husband the perfect job?  His job isn’t bad – it’s actually been going a lot better than it was last year at this time.  My big complaint is the hours…could you give him Saturdays off?  Please?  I would be more than willing to give him to you Monday through Friday from 9 – 5 or even 8 – 4.  He would work his butt off for you from the start of the day to the end of the day – he’s good like that.  In fact, he’s better when he has too much to do.  But could you please just return him to us at the same, decent hour every night?  Oh – and the Saturday thing…we only have 1 day a week at home together (Sunday) and I would really, really like 2 – I’d be even happier with 2 in a row. 

Last but not least, if you can’t take care of all the laundry for me could you at least freeze time while I’m online?  That way I won’t lose so many hours a week while reading blogs and Tweeting.  :)

Thanks so much -

Krajcimama

Now that I’m done complaining…did you notice?  Did you see?  I’ve reached 100 followers!  :)  I’m very excited…I’d throw a party – if I had the time/energy.

Speaking of parties…I went to the UBP on Twitter last night and I won a prize!  Me!  What did I win, you ask…I won a $40 gift certificate to Francie Pants.  I can’t wait to show Danika and let her pick out some patterns!  A big Thank You to 5 Minutes for Mom for hosting the UBP and for the prize!  :)  Pictures will follow – once I place and receive my order! 

My birthday turned out to be a pretty nice day - until my hormones kicked in and turned me in to a crazed woman (but that wasn't until AFTER the kids went to bed...so it's all good).  2 of the biggest highlights were that my BlackBerry went back to normal after being fully submerged in my husband's grandmother's toilet last night.  (stuck it in a bag of rice overnight) AND my daughter slept in big girl underwear for the first time with NO ACCIDENTS!!!  Having 2 out of pull-ups/diapers would be awesome.  Especially since this was the one I never thought would be potty trained.

After waking up and getting surprised with a working phone and dry daughter (and birthday cards from kids and Jerry), Jerry left with Nate to go to the auto body shop to get an estimate for the damage to our van.  We were in a very minor accident the Tuesday before Easter - minor but still $4,000.00.  The other girl's insurance has already contacted us and they will be taking care of everything.  On the way back, he picked up doughnuts and breakfast sandwiches for breakfast.  (Duh) Then he took the "big" kids to play outside almost all day which gave me some time to get some stuff done inside.  He also took them down to the corner store (yes, we still have one of those and it's within walking distance) and bought us sandwiches and cookies and little pizza pillows for lunch.  

After lunch, I went up to tackle the whole switch from winter clothes to summer ones.  We have been having really nice weather and need to get the shorts out.  I NEVER imagined what a gigantic task it is to go through dressers and closets for 6 people.  I'm not even done yet.  I spent about 3 hours up there and got the babies and "big" kids clothes situated.  I have a box for my niece and 3 boxes for Goodwill.  I also have about 4 baskets of laundry - so who knows what's in there.  My room...my clothes...I just didn't have the energy for it yesterday.  Plus, it's all pre-twin-pregnancy and that scares me.  I don't want to open these boxes and find clothes that don't fit...it's too depressing.  *sigh*  I did manage to find a pair of capris that fit quite well when looking for something to wear yesterday.  Maybe it won't be as bad as I think - but I still am willing to bet that I'll have another box for Goodwill when all is said and done.  I'm not holding on to things that I can't wear.  It's too much clutter and too much pressure. 

I have a question - if you are still reading my rambling.  Anyone ever have to teach someone to pedal who just doesn't want to pedal forward?  Danika LOVES her new bike...but she just won't pedal forward.  I've tried moving her feet in the right direction.  I've tried having her watch Nate do it.  Doing it for "pretend" while laying on the floor.  She just can't get it.  I know that it may just be that she needs to keep trying - but if there is some kind of trick, I'd appreciate you sharing it with me so we can get her moving!

Oh - and here...have a picture!

So ~ over at Multiples and More they are celebrating their First Blogiversary.  To commemorate the ending of this week long event, they put up a MckLinky for all sites to link up on.  That’s where I found this. Which has inspired me to elaborate on this – the day we found out we were having TWINS!

I think my original post about finding out we were having twins wasn’t a very good one.  Mainly because I wrote it the day AFTER we found out.  The excitement/fun had worn off and I had already started to worry. 

It was the Wednesday before Easter – I remember because I had my Easter Party with my preschool class the day before and had promised to call the school and tell them if I found out the sex of the baby at the ultrasound the next day. 

Jerry wasn’t excited.  He was more annoyed than anything else because he was “skipping” work to come to the ultrasound.  We had set it up so that he would still make it to work in time to have his weekly conference call with one of his higher ups, who knew where he was going and approved it and all, but Jerry likes routine and this was messing with his routine.  It didn’t help that we waited in the waiting room for a good 25 minutes after our scheduled appointment time had come and gone.  My mom had come to sit with the “big” kids and he was nervous we were keeping her from doing something, too. 

When we finally got back there, the ultrasound tech looked at me like I had 6 heads.  She just couldn’t understand why I was coming in at 18 weeks and not a few weeks later.  She sounded very pessimistic about being able to determine the gender.  I explained that the OB said I was measuring a little bit big and that she just wanted to check the size of the baby to make sure everything was ok.  The ultrasound tech didn’t even turn the screen so I could see as she started.  I wasn’t happy at all – I was actually feeling really disappointed.  Then I saw Jerry make a funny face from the bottom of the table.  I felt the ultrasound tech move from one spot to the other.  Jerry turned his head sideways.

“Well, honey, I know why you are measuring big.”  I think I held my breath here – waiting for some horrible news. “You are having twins!”

The next 30 seconds were a blur.  I remember Jerry’s initial reaction perfectly.  “Oh shit.” he said as he kind of crouched down and covered his face with his hands.  Then he rushed over to me…and the roller coaster ride began at the top again.

We learned from that visit that the twins had separate sacs and separate placentas.  Baby B was most likely a boy (she was 75% sure) They were most likely fraternal – not identical, but we were told that didn’t mean they wouldn’t look alike (they look NOTHING alike). 

We spent the next 40 minutes getting measured and measured again – everything looked great.  I remember the lady doing the ultrasound was the mother of twins.  She was showing an intern the “ropes” and that intern was a twin herself!  What are the chances?  We spent the car ride home trying to decide how to tell people.

Telling people was a lot of fun, actually.  We used pretty much the same approach with everyone.  They asked how the ultrasound went…we showed them one set of pictures.  They gushed over them – asking if we knew the sex.  We said no.  Then we would ask them to look up in the corner – they would then say, “Why does it say Baby A?” We would then whip out the second set of pics and say, “Because they are pretty sure that Baby B is a boy.”  This approach made both my parents cry and Jerry’s mom decide she needed a drink!  (she almost NEVER drinks!)

I did tell my brother and sister-in-law over the phone.  My brother-in-law was first and I just blurted it out because he sounded concerned about why I was calling him at work on a Wednesday.  My sister-in-law thought she didn’t hear me right when I said “they couldn’t tell on the first one”.  She said something about that being too bad but we would probably be able to find out next time.  So then I said something about how big Baby A was and that made her pause…and then ask me what the heck I was talking about.

Looking back, this was really a great day!  It was so much fun letting everyone know!  It was so much fun sharing that with other people.  The months that followed were rocky.  We had moments when we were sure we wouldn’t be able to do this.  Moments when we were in awe that there were 2 babies fighting it out in my belly.  Moments when we were scared.  Moments when we were excited.  It’s funny how all of that seems kind of silly now – now that we’ve been doing this for almost 7 months.  I wonder what we worried so much about.  It’s hard to imagine life any different than it is right now.  It’s hard to imagine life before I found out I was having twins.

That was almost a year ago – but I think I will always think about that day around Easter.  We were really celebrating new life that Easter – not only 1 new life, which were were expecting, but a second new life that was an amazing blessing!

For some reason this morning I started thinking about how much of this my kids are going to remember.  I know that I will remember a lot of it – probably not all of it, which kind of makes me sad – but I know that I will remember a lot.  How much will they remember when they are my age?  When do kids really start remembering and making their memories?

Nate already remembers some things.  In fact, he remembers a lot more than I ever would have thought he would.  He remembers that we went swimming on our vacation – and he wants to go again.  He remembers that we met Nana and Pap Pap and Aunt Mare at the seats outside of Sonic and had lunch there when the weather was nice – now that the weather is nice again, he wants to do that again, too!  He remembers that Grandma Fran looks at the same moon we do every night and that Elena likes to play the Wii.  All things that I wouldn’t have bet on him remembering.

Danika – well, she comes up with the strangest things sometimes.  I still see her as younger than she really is, I think.  Her speech is something that I’m going to have to deal with sooner or later…probably sooner if I can.  Sometimes, though, she will bust out with something really clear and I can understand every word!  She loves Little Bear and this morning was reciting it word for word…which amazed me.

When I think back to my childhood, I remember bits and pieces.  I almost feel like I should write them down somewhere so that I won’t forget more than I already have!  I remember listening to The Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack with my parents on Saturdays while eating breakfast.  I remember my dad playing the 1812th Overture to wake us up in the mornings during summer vacation.  I remember jumping on the bed, breaking it and blaming the whole thing on my sister – then, getting caught!  I remember vacations and weekend trips.  I remember picnics and Lemon Blend.  I remember walking to Dairy Queen and Rosa’s Pizza. 

I don’t remember the everyday stuff as much as I would like to.  I don’t remember things as clearly as I would like to.  I don’t know if anyone does…I wish I could.

Anyway – here are pictures of my kids this morning.  An ordinary morning where we aren’t doing anything special.  I just snapped them: 1, 2, 3, 4.

Here’s what you looked like on March 31, 2010 little ones…where all we did was play with some toys, eat grilled cheese for breakfast (because you wanted to) and laugh with each other:

*I apologize about the absence of some of the pictures in this post - I have no freaking clue what happened or what's going on...but I don't have time to fix it right now!  :(

It's not a bad thing that I'm not finding the time to blog about my weekend on Sunday nights - It usually means that it was a great weekend and I just don't have the energy or that I am really busy with my family and don't have the time. It's not a bad problem to have! So - here's the low down on what went down this weekend.

Saturday we celebrated my friend, Derek’s birthday.  He actually turns 30 this week – but with Easter coming and all we just celebrated this past weekend.  (I run into a similar problem with my birthday, too…it’s the day after his!)

The above picture is only really funny to those of us who are “in on the joke”.  You see, when these guys were younger – much younger – they would spend HOURS kicking a bean bag around to each other.  HOURS and HOURS, night after night - “hacking”.  Well, it got kind of dark and they just couldn’t see that darn bean bag as clearly as they use to…you know eyesight gets worse with age.  So, someone suggested they use a bigger ball.  Much bigger…it was actually hysterical to watch them kick this thing around a circle.  I was just worried that one of them was going to break their ankle or leg…you know bones get more brittle with age.
 
This is proof that I had a glass (or two) too many.  I was drinking wine and really (really) enjoying it.  Here I am towards the end of the night planting a big old kiss on someone who is NOT my husband.  (For the record, my husband is taking the picture – totally not upset, I swear!)

The next day (Sunday) we had an Easter Party to go to.  I must add here that my husband was amazing yesterday morning.  It was further proof of my two (or three) too many glasses of wine that I was having a really tough time getting moving on Sunday morning.  My husband was great!  Took care of the kids and let me “recover” a bit.  He even made everyone breakfast!  What a guy!

So – on to the Easter party. 
Unfortunately, it was raining – so the egg hunt took place inside.  Here are some pics from the party.

Danika (on the left) and my niece, Angelina (on the right) with their egg hunt bags!

Nate was lucky enough to only have one little boy with him in his age category!  His buddy Nicholas!  Boy did they ever make out with the eggs/candy!

My mom’s camera has a much better picture (one where it doesn’t look like I woke Dean up to take this this picture – even though I did).  I’ll have to get it off of her!


I have no idea what is up with the goofy grin. 




You will notice that there is no picture of Danika with the bunny.  This is where my Mama Guilt comes in.  She just wouldn’t do it.  No way – no how.  She was the same with Santa.  It’s not a big deal, really…but it’s not because I don’t WANT her to take a picture with these characters – it’s just that I DON’T want her to cry and scream any more than she already does.  I know that I shouldn’t feel guilty about not making her cry – but I kind of feel guilty that I can’t get her to not cry and just take the picture.  I mean I will have all these pictures of her brothers with Santa and the Easter Bunny (and hopefully Disney Characters some day) but none of my beautiful daughter.  I may have tried to make her take the picture, but I was holding a sleeping baby and there was NO WAY hubby was going to make her do something she didn’t want to…she has him totally wrapped around her finger.

Oh – and the prompt over at Mama Guilt w/Cop Mama was about picky eaters…I totally talked about that last week!  The Nutritional Habit of my Children!

That’s about it.  We ended the weekend eating dinner at my parent’s house and watching the Pens win in a shoot out.

We have a busy busy week ahead of us…so, I’m off to go get started.  First up – laundry…so we don’t have to wear the same underwear all week!  (BTW – I hate laundry…least favorite part is the putting the clothes away part…I hate to admit how much we live out of laundry baskets around here.)

About 5 months ago a group of women who all have one friend in common were brought together by that friend.  It was actually really a great idea for us all to get out and meet some other moms.  I've met some really nice women and generally have a great time when we meet.  It was kind of a ground rule that we would try not to get like most groups of women do - we were not going to judge each other...we were not going to try to one-up each other...we were just going to laugh and have a great time.  My favorite meeting to date was our Christmas one - we had a cookie exchange and I swear I laughed more than I had in a REALLY long time.  I was actually sad to leave!

Our group met last month, but for some reason I couldn't be there.  I missed them so much...which is funny because we only see each other once a month - it's funny how you can miss people you barely see to begin with and don't really know all that well. 

Anyway, we met last night and I almost didn't go.  I was tired.  I was frazzled.  I just wasn't myself.  I'm sure it showed, too.  Tired, paranoid me took over and, even though I did have a great time, I left without the "wow, that was great" feeling I usually have.  I actually felt out of place - I'm not sure why, but I'm betting it was because I probably wasn't fully present...I was too tired and frazzled.  Now, if you are part of the Mommy Group and reading this - I hope that you don't think I'm complaining about anything in particular...it was really more of a not being able to relax and sitting across the room from everyone so I was a little out of it.  I will say, though - the food was awesome as usual!
 
I just wasn't comfortable - I felt like I was in High School again...I loved High School, but I didn't really have a lot of really close female friends during my Junior and Senior year.  The problem with hanging out with a lot of guys when you are younger is that their wives (and the guy you end up marrying) aren't really appreciative of you continuing your friendship at the level it was before anyone got married.  I'm going to have to make sure my daughter understands this and makes an extra effort to have some girlfriends - then again, my closest girlfriends moved out of state...I still have a few who are close enough for us to get together now and then - but life usually gets in the way of that, too.

I know that this is me and not the mommies at Mommy Group because I've been feeling the same way at work, a little.  Just like I've been on the outside watching - like I'm not participating.  It's like I'm not in on some secret that everyone else knows - and it's something about me...is this a common side effect of lack of sleep?  I'm blaming it on no sleep either way!

I hope to catch up this weekend and maybe enjoy Book Club on Monday!  Of course, I haven't finished the book - but I'm not going to let myself loose any sleep over that! 

Oh, and I think I am going to do Friday Follow - if you are here from Friday Follow, leave me a comment and I will head on over to follow you back!  :)

I’m exhausted.  Actually, I’m beyond exhausted…what would that be?  Hmm..

Anyway – I’m sure you can tell by the title of this post that the babies haven’t been sleeping any better.  In fact, the culprit has a new name, “He-who-woke-EVERYONE-up-at-1:53am”.  Yep, it was him – again.

He woke this one up first:

Then together they woke these two:

The only reason I didn’t spend the entire day in a complete and total daze is because I fell asleep at 8:45 pm last night.  I was helping Danika fall asleep and ended up drifting off myself . . . and . . . well . . . just went to bed!  I don’t even feel the slightest bit guilty about it – I am kind of bummed that my DVR has shows on it that I want to watch, but they will be there Friday (which is the next time I’ll be able to watch TV – Go Pens!)

So, when the entire house was awake at 1:53 am I was a little bit more rested than I usually am at 1:53 am.  Still – I’m ready for bed.

My main reason for hopping on to do a post at all today was because the twins had their 6 month visit today.  Apparently, they are doing great.  They are both growing nicely…there is still a 4 lb. difference between the two – David is 16 lbs. 4 oz. and Dean is 19 lbs. 14 oz. – and there is a few inches in their height, too!  David is 27 1/4 inches and Dean is 29 1/4 inches.  According to the doctor, Dean is “off the charts” for his height.  I’m surprised he isn’t off the charts for weight – but maybe it’s just because he’s so tall that he looks so big. 

They got two shots today – and are now sleeping soundly…which I am headed up to do now – because I have a feeling they aren’t going to stay asleep all night.

You didn’t really think that I would be able to write weekend updates on Sunday nights, did you?  hehehe  I did – but yesterday it just didn’t happen.  Mainly, because we aren’t sleeping…again.  Here is the culprit:

For reasons unknown to me – he just doesn’t seem to be able to get comfortable.  I get him to sleep.  He wakes up 40 minutes later.  I get him back to sleep.  He wakes up 20 minutes later.  I get him to sleep.  He sleeps a whole 2 hours and gets up again.  It’s exhausting!  I’m thinking teeth – maybe.  Who knows?  One more baby that was born without an instruction manual…so all I can do is guess – and drink lots and lots of coffee the next morning.

As far as the weekend goes – pretty normal around here.  This is the biggest news:

Before Haircut -

After Haircut -

I gave him a buzz cut!  Of course, when I did it it was in the high 60s and now we’ve dropped down to the low 50s…but he needed it cut.  He’ll look normal again by Easter.

Other than the haircut, we didn’t do a whole lot.  We went to my parents for dinner and the kids got to run around in their back yard for a few hours.  We had some friends over with their kiddos on Friday and I may (or may not) have had a tiny bit too much wine – I really didn’t want to have to make room for it in my fridge.  :)  I took the paper snowflakes down in my living room.  I’m still working on laundry – it NEVER ends!

For some reason, Jerry and I have been watching those paranormal shows On-Demand.  You know, Paranormal State, Paranormal Cops and Ghost Hunters.  I’m not really sure why we are watching.  Funny thing is that it scares the heck out of Jerry – and mostly makes me laugh.  It just kills me that they always try to make something out of nothing.  I’m not saying that there isn’t paranormal things that happen – maybe some of the stuff they have happen really is real…but it’s TV for goodness sake.  All that being said – I kept seeing things last night.  I would hear Dean moving around and open my eyes because I knew it was my turn to go get his binkie.  I’d see something standing next to the bed or in the hall or the one time I actually thought Jerry was sitting up next to me in bed when he was sleeping.  I chalk it up to an overactive imagination – which is EXACTLY what I think those shows do and why people watch them . . . they give us those little bursts of adrenaline. 

Before we started watching those shows, we watched the first hour of Life on Discovery.  Jerry set the DVR to record it – I’m usually not one for nature shows…but it was pretty cool.  We’ll definitely be watching the rest of them this week!

I guess that’s about it – I’ve got stuff to do today…which means it will either be a great day and go really fast or I’ll be extremely frustrated because my babies need me and I can’t get anything done.  I’m hoping for option 1 – but I’m gonna try to be patient and enjoy my babies if it’s option 2.

Here’s to a great week!  *chugging coffee on my way to make 2 bottles and grab 2 diapers*