Perfecting Imperfection

I don't really have anything to blog about this morning.

The thing is...I know that I complained a bit in my last post and for some unknown reason I don't like to leave a complaining blog post as the first post visible on my blog for a long time - it's a karma thing, or something...

So, since I really have nothing to blog about - but don't want negativity radiating throughout my entire weekend - I'm just going to give you some random stuff...in no particular order...with no purpose, really. 

First of all (because I know it is the first question you would ask), yes - we slept a little bit better last night.  That's all I'm saying because I don't want to jinx anything! 

Did you notice my new layout?  Probably not if you are reading through a reader (like I do) - so head on over to my blog and check it out...let me know what you think!  I used The Cutest Blog on the Block and was totally inspired by my friend, Chrisine's new layout.  (you should check her's out, too!)

I made Tuna Noodle Casserole last night for dinner.  Here's the recipe I used.  It's an Allrecipes recipe.  I use allrecipes.com for just about everything.  I have quite a few cookbooks - and I love looking through them, but when I need a recipe for something it is just so much easier to jump over there and find something.  Plus, there are usually a lot of reviews and suggestions for how to improve a recipe.  Since I'm not a big improviser in the kitchen - this is great for me!  I also love the Easy Meatloaf and World's Best Lasagna recipes from there.

We have an Easter party to go to tomorrow - so be on the lookout for bunny pictures in the near future.  I'm excited for the kids to get out and have some fun.  Plus, it's somewhere where I know I'll have help with the little guys or chasing the big kids if I need it.  I don't have to worry as much because it will be more than just Jerry and I keeping an eye on them.  *whew*  Although, my least favorite part of any outing is packing the bag - I can't wait for the day when I can walk out of the house without a bag the size of a pillowcase full of all the crap I need to take with me wherever I go.  (Please...Please don't tell me to keep an extra bag packed by the door and just refill it as needed - I don't have enough bottles and the last time I tried that the kids didn't get a chance to wear the change of clothes before they grew out of them!)

Speaking of parties, I'm headed to one tonight, too!  Except this is an "adult" party - no kiddos.  It's a 30th birthday part for a friend of mine.  In fact - it's a party with a bunch of my old High School/College Years friends.  Which could explain why I've felt like I'm in High School again lately.  :) 

Mentally, I prepared myself for the comments I'll get tonight.  Now, I don't know for sure if anyone will say anything - but chances are they will and I just want to be prepared...it gets really old, ya know.  So...if someone gives me the look and says, "So, are you done?" or "I think this is the first time I've seen you in the past 4 years and you haven't been pregnant!"  or "Wow, you must really have your hands full!  How do you do it?" or "Better you than me." or "Did you figure out what causes that, yet?" or "I don't know what I would do if I had 4 kids!" . . . I'll be ready.  I may not say exactly what I'll be thinking, but I will know that it isn't their fault.  They really don't understand.  You see, we didn't plan on having 4 children this close together.  Heck, we didn't plan on having 4 children!  However, I wouldn't be able to pick one to give back - I couldn't (and don't want to) imagine life without one of them!  They have all made our lives exactly the way it should be.  Yeah, it's not easy.  I understand why some people stop at 1 or 2.  I even understand why some people don't have any children.  That's just not for me - I always knew I was going to be a mommy...I always knew I'd have more than 1 baby.  Now, I NEVER thought I'd have twins and I NEVER thought I'd have 4 kids, but I'm happy about it and wouldn't change a thing.

All that being said, my kids are really starting to amuse me lately.  Nate says the most bizarre things sometimes!  Yesterday, he was talking to Danika - they were playing dress up and she had a Sleeping Beauty outfit on. 

Danika: I not Danika.  I Sleeping Booty!
Nate:  Okay, you're a Sleeping Booty!

Then he cracked up - like he actually knew he had called her a sleeping butt or something.  Is it possible?  Could he really have gotten that joke?  Well - he did tell my dad that he wanted to look up "SpongeBob Farts" on his Droid while they were waiting in line to get into preschool.  I know nothing about boys - I think it's time to revisit that book I bought when he was born!

I’m exhausted.  Actually, I’m beyond exhausted…what would that be?  Hmm..

Anyway – I’m sure you can tell by the title of this post that the babies haven’t been sleeping any better.  In fact, the culprit has a new name, “He-who-woke-EVERYONE-up-at-1:53am”.  Yep, it was him – again.

He woke this one up first:

Then together they woke these two:

The only reason I didn’t spend the entire day in a complete and total daze is because I fell asleep at 8:45 pm last night.  I was helping Danika fall asleep and ended up drifting off myself . . . and . . . well . . . just went to bed!  I don’t even feel the slightest bit guilty about it – I am kind of bummed that my DVR has shows on it that I want to watch, but they will be there Friday (which is the next time I’ll be able to watch TV – Go Pens!)

So, when the entire house was awake at 1:53 am I was a little bit more rested than I usually am at 1:53 am.  Still – I’m ready for bed.

My main reason for hopping on to do a post at all today was because the twins had their 6 month visit today.  Apparently, they are doing great.  They are both growing nicely…there is still a 4 lb. difference between the two – David is 16 lbs. 4 oz. and Dean is 19 lbs. 14 oz. – and there is a few inches in their height, too!  David is 27 1/4 inches and Dean is 29 1/4 inches.  According to the doctor, Dean is “off the charts” for his height.  I’m surprised he isn’t off the charts for weight – but maybe it’s just because he’s so tall that he looks so big. 

They got two shots today – and are now sleeping soundly…which I am headed up to do now – because I have a feeling they aren’t going to stay asleep all night.

I have twins. I have twin boys that will be 6 months old in 5 days (I think it's 5...yeah, it's 5).  It's not easy having twins, but I don't really dwell on it much.  If I sit and think about how difficult having twins is it will just be harder - better to shut up and do what I have to do than sit around and whine about it.  The funny thing is, though, having twins doesn't really feel any different that having 2 babies.  That sounds stupid...let me see if I can explain a little more.

Our twins are fraternal twins.  Which means that they are NOT identical.  In fact, if you could have polar opposite twins we would have those.  Dean (who was the first one born and has always been about 2 pounds bigger than his brother) has a lovely olive complexion, dark eyes and fuzzy dark hair.  David (who was the second one born and my tiniest baby) is very fair skinned, blond hair and blue eyes.  Their builds are completely different.  They just look NOTHING alike!

The difference in appearance makes it easy to tell them apart (wow - truly am Mrs. Obvious today).  So...we don't have that "how do you tell them apart" problem people often have with twins.  Although, I've had people ask me that and tell me they wouldn't be able to tell them apart.  To which I respond, "Really - LOOK AT THEM!!!"  Ugh.

We also had our first two children very close together.  They were 14 months apart.  While that isn't the same thing as having twins, it is taking care of two "babies" at the same time.  I think that prepared us for the twins' arrival and all the work involved.  Seriously, it isn't that difficult...okay, sometimes it is - but day-to-day it isn't that bad and I think that is because we had Nate and Danika so close together.  It got us use to all the craziness.

Shortly after the boys were born Jerry and I had a conversation about how different they looked.  He commented, "Geeze, we can't even get twins right.  They aren't REALLY twins.  They are just like brothers."  Umm...NOOOO.  Trust me they ARE twins.  I should know.  But I get his point.  When we go places, once they are older and it's harder to tell, I bet people won't know they are twins...unless we tell them.

I have mixed emotions about this.  On one hand I'm happy because it will be so much easier for them to develop and maintain their own identity.  On the other hand I feel like they are missing out somehow.  I mean they have a twin brother, but they won't be able to play tricks on people like the girls in The Parent Trap did!  Oh, wait...maybe that is a blessing.  Hmmm...

I was going to move these pictures around to fit neatly in my post - but I'm being summoned to the living room to play yet another round of The Ladybug Game....so here are some pics for you to look at!

David and Nate playing on the floor

Dean - happy after his bath with Nate and Danika

Pretty soon we are moving them to their own cribs - I hope they do okay...I think I'll probably cry a little.  *sniff*sniff*

Al Bundy - Seriously, why does he do this?

Just had to take a picture...

My wonderful hubby bought me this - as a last minute Christmas present this year:



I LOVE IT!  I've used it to capture precious moments like this and this.  It is small enough that I can grab it and take it just about anywhere.  It's easy to make DVDs with it and share them with my family and friends.  Nate LOVES watching the DVD we made of our trip through Hartwood Acres this past Christmas...it puts Danika to sleep, so that's a bonus.

The other thing about the Flip Video is that it is easy to use.  One button pretty much does it all.  It's so easy to use, in fact, a 4 year-old can do it.  See exhibit A:




Did you notice that it is durable, too?  After all it was chucked onto my dining room table and then picked back up without missing a beat!  Sound quality isn't too bad either.  Did you hear the sizzle of me cooking chicken in the background?  For the price - it's perfect for us right now and one of the best Christmas presents ever - next to this, of course...Less than 1 month to go!!!  :)

 

Don't you just love saying that? Nom . . . Nom . . . Nom . . . you can't help but smile after you finish the third Nom...but I digress.


These are why I'm posting today:


My babies are officially eating baby food - HOMEMADE (okay...blended from frozen) BABY FOOD!

While I'm adding pictures...you might as well look at these, too.





Adorable? You betcha!

I've been thinking a lot about my blog title - Perfecting Imperfection.  At first, I chose it because I thought it was witty and kind of cute...now I'm seeing more and more how it's also a very good fit.  I am not perfect.  I've never claimed to be and I'm certainly not going to start right now.  Actually, I find it easy to admit I was wrong and just move on more and more these days because my priorities have shifted greatly and I don't have time to worry about being right anymore.  My new priorities are the most important I've ever had in my life - they are my precious children and they are really all that matter...along with DH, of course...and the rest of my family.  :)

Anyway, as I was saying, I am not perfect.  I have accepted the fact that I will always have debt, dirty laundry to do and 10-15lbs or more that I could lose.  I will always be at least a little tired and more often than not will have roots that need dyed.  My house will not always be neat and orderly.  In fact, it will probably look like a tornado went through it most days and even some nights (when I'm too exhausted to put it back together before going to bed).  Some nights I will order pizza for dinner and some days we will not get out of our pajamas ALL DAY LONG!  I will probably forget some birthdays that I meant to remember (I am so horrible with this) and be looking for something that I lost a week ago and still haven't found.  I am not organized.  I do not have it together.

I often hear the comment, "You really have your hands full, don't you?"

I always lie and tell people, "It's not that bad."

I guess it's not a complete and total lie.  It can be bad - if I let it get to me.  If I sit and think about all the ways my life isn't "perfect" or even "almost perfect", I will most certainly have some kind of a breakdown.  Those days do happen.  I have days where I think about how much easier life would have been if we would only have Nate...or would have stopped after Danika.  We are so outnumbered.  We are overwhelmed.  We are on the verge of insanity some days...

We are also so blessed.  We are so loved.  We are overjoyed - as if it is possible to have too much joy in one's life.  As many times as I think about how our life would have been easier without the twins I also think about how our life is fuller with them.  Our life is full of more happiness, more love and more laughter because of them. I can imagine life without them but I don't want to.  I mean just LOOK at them!

I will say that I count my blessings daily.  I am so incredibly lucky that all of my children are healthy.  I am so blessed that I am in a happy marriage.  I have everything that I need and some things that I don't need but am lucky enough to enjoy anyway.  So, when the days come when I feel like I'm becoming sucked in by the insanity I remind myself of these things.  My problems will pass - each day will end with the possibility of tomorrow being better...not perfect because I don't expect perfection - in fact I'm getting better at imperfection...not getting better at being imperfect but getting better at enjoying it.

It was just one of those weekends...everyone was sick and we had a lot of stuff to take care of this weekend.  Not a lot of places to go...but a lot of stuff to do.  One of the big things that needed done was digging out Jerry's car.  We dug the van out the day we got the big snow.  We didn't dig out Jerry's car.  I figured I wasn't going anywhere anyway...so, he could just take the van and I'd hang out at home with the kiddos.  I do have to go to work tomorrow, though.  So, we need both vehicles dug out.  Jerry dug it out yesterday....took him a little under an hour.  When he came in he looked at me and said, "I wonder how many pounds of snow I've shoveled?"  Without skipping a beat I responded, "I wonder how many gallons of snot I've sucked out of noses?"  That about sums up the last few days.  :) 

It was a good weekend, though.

We are continuing to have great Potty Success (if you haven't seen this video of Danika yet...it's hysterical!).  The only accident was one when she fell asleep on the couch - can't blame her there.  She even kept her Pull-Up dry at Nana and Pap Pap's house yesterday! 

Speaking of yesterday...I actually put real clothes on (make-up and everything) and went out with Jerry.  We went to the mall for a little bit and ate at Chili's.  I had their Quesadilla Explosion Salad and it was awesome.  I also had a few adult beverages - and they were yummy, too.  Which is probably part of the reason we headed to Best Buy next and made a few bigger purchases.  The one I'm really excited about is this:

I've been complaining about not being able to print from my laptop for probably 6 months.  Our desktop (which finally bit the dust) took forever to load any program and even longer to turn on.  One night I ended up not going grocery shopping until 9:00 pm because I couldn't get my grocery list to print.  No more, though!  I also got a new coat (80% off!!!), a new purse and a new pair of sunglasses.  All in all it was a great trip.

I just have to add these pics on to the end of the post - I think Matchbox cars lined up in a row by little hands are just adorable...Cars Matchbox cars are even cuter.