Perfecting Imperfection

So ~ I have been wanting to post a blog post all week.

Tuesday, I worked and then took the kids to the Good Shepard program at church (it's like CCD for little guys) and then went to my Mommy Group meeting (which was a lot of fun).

Wednesday...I spent most of my time online trying to play around with my layout and looking at graphics and trying to decide if my blog is worth a monetary investment or if I should just leave it as is...I'm still not sure.  Then, I had a quick visit with my grandmother, watched my niece for a while, made dinner and went for a ride to get a cup of coffee with all the kids - we had to get out of the house or I was going to pull my hair out!

Thursday it was back to work and then to my mom and dad's house for dinner.  We spent the evening visiting with my grandmother before she headed back to Florida this morning.  Here are some pics:








The kids had a great time with "Grandma Fran" and I was really glad she made it up here to spend some time with us.  Her visit was too short ~ but it was so nice to see her and give her a big hug!

Today, I'm suppose to go out to lunch with my aunt and my grandfather just called saying that he was going to stop by with something for Jerry.  3 out of the 4 of us that are home are still in our pajamas (myself included). In fact, Dean is only in his real clothes because he had a diaper blow out this morning...in foot pajamas...it was not fun.  I gave him a bath before bringing him downstairs.

So ~ my real life is once again preventing me from spending the time I want to on blogging and reading blogs. I'm guessing that is what is suppose to happen because people always ask me how I find the time to blog.  I guess I really don't have the time...but don't worry - I'm not giving up, yet!  :)

Oh - btw...I do have dinner in the Crockpot as we speak.  So, I'm slightly ahead of the game!

Happy Friday!

So - I'm currently in that place where things are suppose to go back to normal but don't feel normal at all.  I'm sure that is normal when you are dealing with a loss.  The funeral for Memaw was a wonderful tribute to her amazing life.  All the branches of her family tree were represented and those who were unable to be here extended their thoughts and prayers.  Parts of my blog post about Memaw were even worked into the eulogy that her grandson, Bobbie, read.  I think Memaw would have been really happy that her family was together to celebrate her life.  We had dinner at my sister-in-law, Lori's, house on Tuesday.  It was full of laughter and memories and Chicken and Halusky.  :)  (FYI - that isn't Memaw's recipe...but how cool is it that there is a Slovak Cooking website!?!)  We went back to Memaw's house after the funeral on Thursday and took a picture with everyone who was there - if you are reading this and you have a copy PLEASE send one to me...I didn't have my camera!  :(  We looked at pictures and talked about what wonderful memories we have of Memaw and her home.


 I had a wonderful day with my grandmother who is visiting from Florida yesterday!  We went to the mall and the new five below store (which was a pretty neat store!).  We had an amazing dinner of homemade sauce and roast and ziti...mmmm.  Today, we ate some halupky (again, not the right recipe...but you get the idea) that Memaw and my mother-in-law had made and frozen.  They were delicious.  


Now...it's suppose to be back to normal, right?   Doesn't feel right.  To top it all off, my kiddos are sick!  I hear coughing and hacking upstairs...ugh.  I already made the necessary phone calls to inform everyone that Nate will not be going to school.  We are taking a sick day and I'm hoping that a vaporizer and some extra Vitamin C will whip us into shape!  What a way to start a week!  


I did, however, have to time to make a menu plan this weekend, go shopping and only forget 2 things! I thought that I would share it as part of Meal Plan Monday over at I'm an Organizing Junkie since I've been LOVING looking at other menus posted by bloggers.  So...without further blabbing by me...I give you:

P.S. - I think that something funky is going on with my Intense Debate Comment Form and this blog layout.  If you can't find a way to comment, try going to the main blog page and then click on the Comments link...or am I crazy?  Anyone having a problem?

I feel like I spent the whole weekend waiting for a phone call.  Very similar to when you are expecting a new life to enter the world and you are sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring.  I wasn't waiting to hear that a new life entered the world, though.  I was waiting to hear that a wonderful woman was finally at peace and had left this world.  I was waiting to hear those words, "She's gone".

The call came at 5:43 this morning from Jerry's sister, Mare.  It was one of those calls that you knew what the person on the other line was going to say and thought that maybe if you didn't answer the phone it wasn't true.  However, the news came as a bit of a relief along with the sadness.  Even though you love someone and can't bear the thought of life without them - this time it was more upsetting to imagine her enduring any more pain.  It is a relief to know that her suffering is over.  It is a relief to know she is at peace.

Picture of Memaw and her husband - given to us by Jerry's cousin on her 90th birthday.

Thinking about life when faced with death is kind of a natural thing.  You think of the life of the person but you also think of all the lives they were involved in - either lives they created, improved or changed forever.  Memaw has 5 children, 15 grandchildren and 23 great-grandchildren.  She has touched a lot of lives.  She was 94 years old and I only knew her for the last 12 years of her life but I will remember her for the rest of mine.

Memaw and Nate - the day he was born

Memaw with Danika a few days after we brought her home

Memaw with 10 of her Great Grandchildren

Memaw with Dean

Memaw with David

 This week is going to be a tough one.  We will be saying goodbye to someone who has given us wonderful memories and shared a lot of laughs and love with us.  Jerry has such amazing memories of his Grandmother.  She was at home in her bed for the past 2 days - Jerry spent a lot of time there just being with his family.  I'm really grateful that he was able to do that.  I'm glad that his family was able to be with her in her home one more time.  Even if she was getting ready to leave them...I know that they found a great deal of comfort in being able to be with her in the house that her husband built and her father and husband also passed away in.

I keep trying to end this post with a message to Memaw - even though I talked to her yesterday...but those words aren't coming or perhaps I just don't want to share them.  Maybe it's that I'm not in the right mind frame to say them...to say goodbye.  We are in the preparing to say goodbye stage of the process.  Which I don't remember being this hectic before because I didn't have to think about flowers or babysitters or suits when I've lost loved ones in the past.  Before, I was able to cry and be held - now I have to get things done first.  I know that the time will come when it won't matter what I got done and what I didn't and then I will cry, again.

Thank you for your thoughts, well wishes and prayers for me, my husband and our family.  We lost a very special person and will need to take time to heal.  However, we are a pretty strong family because of her and we will get through it together.

Thank you, Memaw - for all that you gave me...

I swear my memory gets more and more faded every year.  I was laying in bed last night trying to remember my first year of teaching.  I remembered bits and pieces but nothing vividly.  Then I tried remembering the big move I made from Kindergarten to Third Grade - again, I can't remember much.

I blame it on the fact that I have too much on my mind.  Most days a running "to-do" list fills up my brain.  Other days it simply shuts down to have a break.  I'm hoping that I can jog my memory a bit by continuing to write these Sentimental Saturday posts.

I had a really tough time thinking about what to write about today, though.  My mind is more clouded than usual these days.  I thought I would just share a few memories I have of my grandmother who will be visiting next week!

My Grandmother and Dad at my wedding

My Grandmother moved to Florida when I was . . . umm . . . 12?  It was around then, I think.  However, she has been here for every important event in my life.  She came to my High School graduation.  She was here when I got married and she was here shortly after my babies were born.  :)

I also spent time in Florida with her and my Aunt Anita.  I remember our trip to the Keys and I remember how we went out and had a drink together after I had turned 21 and went down to pick up my "baby" cousin - who is now 21 himself!

I remember bits and pieces of things we did when she lived here.  I remember sleep overs with my cousins.  I remember seashells spread out on a carpeted floor with quarters, nickels and dimes hidden underneath them.  I remember BIG Christmas Eve dinners.  I remember my Grandmother dressed up for Halloween.  I remember her singing in the pew behind us at church.

I also have a lot of memories from her visits throughout the years.  She would stay with us when she came up and I always LOVED that was with us when we went to bed and still there when we woke up the next morning.  Those mornings were always my favorite.  Having breakfast in our pajamas.  I remember a salmon colored robe that she had (she may even still have it) that was silky.  I can see her sitting at our dining room table eating some buttered toast and drinking a cup of coffee.  I remember one Christmas when she came up and I decided to turn my bedroom into a hotel.  I can't remember what all I did, but she still has the notes I left her thanking her for staying at our hotel.

My room was in attic and there were three windows that looked down on the whole street.  I remember her calling the police one night when she saw people opening car doors and going through them.

One of the best memories I have of my grandmother from her visits up here is when we waited until everyone was asleep and crept down the stairs from my attic bedroom to have cookies and milk together by Christmas tree light.  :)

A little over a year ago - when Grandma came to meet the twins

I can't wait to take a new picture next week!  She's going to be amazed at how much they have grown!

I don't know how old my Grandmother is - but however old it is I can assure you that you would probably have a hard time believing that she has 8 (soon to be 9) Great Grandchildren!  She posts messages on my Facebook page and reads my blog.  My friends are amazed when I tell them that I get email from my Grandmother.  There are a lot of times when I wish that we lived closer to each other - but I find my Grandmother a great source of support and inspiration.  Every time we talk to one another she tells me how much she just loves my husband and how lucky I am that I married one of my friends.  She made me feel normal when I wasn't feeling normal.  She told me about how she went through a lot of the same emotions I have gone through in the past 6 months.  She had 3 children and knows how tough it can be with a lot of little ones.  Above all things, she has shown me the importance of being a strong woman.  I admire her for so many things but mainly for her outlook on life.  She enjoys it.  She lives it and she loves those who she had a part in giving it to!

Can't wait to see you, Grandma!