Perfecting Imperfection

I know there is a total of about 3 people who actually read my blog, but I thought I'd throw this out there anyway. These are pictures taken by my friend, Shannon. You can look at some of her other work at www.sofabean.com/blog and if you are in the area you can have her come take beautiful pictures of your kiddos (or just about anything else)!

You can see more of the pics she took of my kids on my facebook page - here.

Two and a half weeks ago I got up early in the morning and headed down to Forbes Regional Hospital to have a scheduled c-section and meet my twin boys. Everything went as planned and Dean Arthur and David Jerome were born 1 minute apart at 10:30 and 10:31 am. Dean was the first one out and weighed a whooping 8lbs even. David was the second one (which makes him my baby baby) and weighed only 5lbs 15oz. We knew there was going to be a size difference all along - we also knew there was nothing to really be worried about with it.

After getting all "cleaned-up" in the OR, we headed down to the room. I don't remember a lot about the time immediately after they were born. I know my parents and Jerry's mom were all there and found their way down to the room shortly after we got there. I wasn't feeling all that great the first night. Jerry stayed with me, but I had to stay in bed the whole time. I was sore and couldn't feel a whole lot below my waist for a while. The next few days would be much better.

I really really enjoyed my hospital stay. I enjoyed having someone else feed me. I enjoyed having someone else watch the boys while I slept for a few hours. Most of all, though, I enjoyed getting to know my two new sons without anyone else around. I enjoyed being with them and bonding with them while my other children were having the time of their lives with their grandparents. :)

Since coming home things have gotten interesting. My hormones are all out of whack...although they seem to be getting better. My c-section incision isn't healing as fast/easily as I would like it to. I don't sleep much and I am constantly telling my 3 and 2 year-old to stay away from their brothers. Now that Jerry has gone back to work, I'm on my own during the days...and it's a little scary sometimes.

I have to hand it to my husband, though. He really really stepped up when he was off and has continued to do an awesome job helping out with the kids - especially with Nate and Danika at bedtime. I'm soo proud of him and have no doubts that we are going to be just fine.

It's funny but I already have that feeling like I don't remember what life was like before the twins got here. I already feel like they have always been part of our family. I know that it's because they are both such a perfect fit and I am so madly in love with both of them. They really have stolen my heart.

These babies will be my last babies - yes, we are sure and it is final and permanent. I won't be having any more children. It makes me kind of sad - but it also helps me to appreciate this time with my newborns even more. I don't mind the 1 am feedings as much...I don't mind changing 20 diapers a day...I don't mind the little things because once they stop it's over. When I give my 0-3 month clothes away this time I won't be needing them back...I'm okay with it. I'm ready to move on to the next stage of my life...but I'm still kind of sad that I won't be making anymore new life. My job now is to make the lives I've already created happy and full of love.