Perfecting Imperfection

Okay . . . Something very odd happened the other day.  ALL 4 of my kids hung out with me for a good hour or so for no real reason - except there was a reason . . . but it was an unspoken reason. They knew I needed it.



I've never really been shy about talking about my depression. It's part of me and I am NOT ashamed of it - I have a lot going on and I think people often think that is what's "wrong". BUT my busy life isn't what makes me depressed. If you don't know what causes depression . . . you should go and look it up. It's not simple and everyone who suffers from it does so differently. It's also not a sign of weakness and it is serious. At my worst, I cried non-stop for 3 days straight and didn't get out of my pajamas or do more than the absolute BARE MINIMUM to keep myself and my family afloat before ending up in a doctor's office. I remember telling myself over and over that I wasn't going to be that chick who broke down and started crying as soon as the doctor walked in. He walked in . . . asked me how I was doing . . . I took a deep breath, said, "Well . . . " with a crack in my voice and lost it. That was almost 8 years ago. 

I've been REALLY lucky the last year or so, though. I have only really had 2 minor low points. Both of them were manageable with a little patience on the part of those that I love the most - and I was back to "myself" in no time. I've found some awesome products that are helping me to have more natural energy and raise my cortisol levels . . . it's been a blessing!

However, this time I've noticed my mood has lingered a bit longer than I'd like and I do believe it is in part due to stress. May has ALWAYS been a stressful month for me as a teacher. There are a lot of last minute things to do. Lessons to wrap up and goodbyes to plan. The thing is - the end of the school year comes no matter how ready or not I am. And it's upon us.

So - back to the picture and my kids all hanging out with me at the SAME TIME! Did you know that cuddling can help with stress, depression and anxiety?  It's true and as these 4 mind readers were taking turns bowling on the Wii . . . each one of them came over and gave me a hug or snuggled up next to me while waiting for their turn. I'm pretty sure they knew I was off but also knew that I was okay. I do the same thing when I can sense they are in need of a boost in their oxytocin. 

So while, yes, we do medicate for things that we need to medicate for (and that includes depression) we also believe in healing through hugs in this family. Even if it doesn't cure everything . . . it doesn't hurt, either! 

This past weekend, we celebrated the 50th wedding anniversary of 2 AMAZING people. My in-laws, Marge and Jerry Sr.


I try to always find the positive in people despite the things they do to annoy me. With these 2, though, it isn't hard to focus on the things that make them amazing. If I could write a list of what the perfect in-laws would be like . . . there isn't much that would be different from the ones I have.

I'd be lying if I said that my father-in-law and I always see eye-to-eye on everything. I've learned that he doesn't believe in global warming (and to not talk to him about it) and that he is the definition of a stereotypical Catholic Conservative. I don't say that like it's a BAD thing - it's just the truth and once you accept that side of him and know that is where he will always be coming from, it is pretty easy to overlook the opinions that don't line up with yours (at least it is for me, anyway).

His strength, and what I am most grateful for, is how much he truly loves and cares about his family. I'm sure we all drive him crazy now and then (just ask him about covering his TV buttons with cardboard so the twins wouldn't turn the channel or turn it off just to hear him yell) but despite the fact that we aren't perfect, he still gives and ALWAYS tells the kids he is so happy they came to see him every time they walk in the door. I don't know if he realizes how much that makes me smile every time he says it.   

My in-laws with their 3 children (photo courtesy of Uncle Bob)

My mother-in-law is the closest thing to a perfect person that I have ever met. I know some really amazing people, but she is one of THE MOST amazing. She never hesitates to help if we need her. She is always doing thoughtful things and shows up for EVERYTHING! She is a retired nurse and knows exactly how to make things better - but NEVER forces her thoughts or opinions on you. She almost always has a cup of coffee or something to eat when you pop in and NEVER forgets dessert when she makes dinner (which is usually once a week!). She is EXACTLY how I want to be when I become a mother-in-law. She gave each of my babies their first bath, babysat when I went back to work after having the twins, she always saves me a container of her green bean and kielbasa soup (which is my FAVORITE) and remembers every birthday, holiday and anniversary.

She is the first person that I would go to with a problem after my own parents (who are equally as wonderful!) and I know that she would do anything for any of us.

I don't know how I got so lucky . . . but I do thank God EVERY DAY for giving me these amazing people in my life and in my children's' lives. (Oh - and for the amazing son they raised . . . who just happens to be the love of my life). 

My in-laws with 8 of their 10 grandchildren (photo courtesy of Uncle Bob)

Yes - it's been 6 years since my last blog post here - I kind of can't believe that the blog is still around and I can add to it!  Just look how I've changed!!!

2012                                                                                2018

A LOT of other things have changed since my last blog post on Perfecting Imperfection but there is NO way to catch you all up. However, I missed having this little online journal (because that's more of what THIS blog was) so I'm back to ramble on about my everyday life . . . the bigger stuff . . . and all that crap in between that you may or may not be interested in. 

I won't be offended if you aren't - not to be rude (even though it will sound a little rude) but I'm not REALLY blogging for you. I'd love to chat with you if something I say strikes you as a conversation starter . . . I'd love feedback or thoughts . . . just know that there isn't a rhyme or reason to any of the stuff I will share but I needed an outlet for my internal monologue. This is it - Welcome!

Dadone, me, Nate and Dad @ Nate's Baptism

Friday night my grandfather passed away.  It was 9 o'clock . . . about an hour after I left the hospital.  My Mom and Dad and Aunt Anita were with him when he went and they said it was very peaceful.  I'm grateful that they were there and that he didn't struggle or suffer.  I also very grateful that I was able to spend some time with him Thursday night - even though he couldn't talk, we held hands (he squeezed my hand tight) he looked at me and I knew that he knew I was there and that he loved me and he knew I loved him, too.

My grandfather and I had a good relationship.  It wasn't always great and I will admit that the last few months I didn't make the effort I should have to spend time with him.  Of course, I regret that now.  However, my grandfather knew that having 4 kids kept me very busy and I did ask about him, talk to him on the phone a few times and think about him often.

When my children are being stubborn, I blame it on my grandfather.  Funny, I know, but he was one of the most stubborn individuals I've ever met.  When he made a decision it was set in stone and no one would ever be able to talk him out of it.  I don't ever remember a story where someone said that my grandfather admitted or knew he was wrong...I'm pretty sure in his eyes he was always right and the rest of us, who sometimes thought otherwise, just didn't know what we were talking about.  There was no real compromising with my grandfather.  It was his way or the highway and a lot of times people I love a great deal were hurt because of this, sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally.

I know it hurt me when he decided not to attend my wedding but I also knew that's the way he was and there was no talking him into coming once he had made that decision.  All that was left for me (and my family) to do was to accept it.  He never meant to hurt me personally with his decision, though, and I got over it (or at the very least didn't let it ruin one of the best days of my life).  He did send me some silk sheets and a bottle of champagne to celebrate, though...completely different than the wedding gift he game my dad.  He obviously wanted his granddaughter to have great-grandchildren  for him a lot sooner than he had wanted his son to have his grandchildren.  :)  (okay, I won't leave you guessing . . . he gave my dad a GROSS of condoms - not a pack . . . an entire gross - that's 144 total - for his wedding present.)

Dadone, me, Danika and Dad @ Danika's baptism

My grandfather had a very big heart - sometimes bigger than it should be - when it came to his friends and he gave to so many people.  He loved my kids and always smiled when they were around.  He loved to joke around with them and share stories of when he was younger.  He always had a story to tell.  He knew so much about cooking and food that I knew exactly who to ask about the differences in this spice or that and what I could substitute if I wanted something different than what a recipe called for.  Dinners with him at the table were almost like cooking lessons.  He loved good food and everything had a special name with him.  For example, sauerkraut was German Spaghetti and my favorite macaroni salad that he made (it had dill in it) was called Russian Macaroni Salad.

When I was younger, I thought my grandfather was invincible.  He was so strong, big and full of life.  When I saw him Friday, I couldn't help but become overwhelmed thinking about what he looked like lying in his hospital bed.  The difference years make . . . it's hard to accept.

The next few days are going to really stink...I hate funerals (okay, I know I'd be very hard pressed to find anyone who doesn't hate them) and funerals where I will see so many people I love upset are even worse.  I am definitely in that stage where I know what happened and what is coming but it hasn't REALLY sunk in yet.  I've been through this enough times, though, to know that at some point in the next 3 days it will hit me like a ton of bricks and I will have my breakdown.  Then . . . it will happen a few weeks later (probably at Easter because my grandfather always shared a special Easter Saturday brunch with us) and then it will happen again . . . as much as I hated the book The Year of Magical Thinking, I will say that the first year without someone is it's own special journey.


I would greatly appreciate prayers for my family (especially my father, aunt and uncle) as we get ready to bury our patriarch.  It is going to be very emotional and probably even a little bit stressful as we go down memory lane with each other and ultimately say goodbye to a man who is responsible (in one way or another) for giving us each other.

Dadone,

Thank you for giving me my wonderful family.  Thank you for always having a smile for me and my children and for loving us the best way you knew how.  We love you and will miss you dearly.

Love, your eldest grandchild,
Janene

Miss me?  You should come visit over at More Than Mommies!  I've been focusing a lot on my new blog and kind of ignoring this one here . . . I kinda figured that would happen but I'm not ready to give up on Perfecting Imperfection quite yet.  I love sharing More Than Mommies with Christine, it makes me feel like we are offering more and reaching more people because we sharing the work load, but I also don't want to abandon the space that is all mine on the world wide web!

So . . . here's a quick list to get you up to date on what's been going on around here:

1) Spring is coming!  This year Jerry and I invested in a Zoo Membership and we (at least I) can't wait to use it as much as possible!  I actually already took the kids once - the day I bought it!!!

2) We are still looking to sell our house:




3)  We are still searching for the perfect house to move our growing family into . . . we are totally at our limit here.  We need a bigger space ASAP!  We did find one we liked (or loved but I keep telling myself it wasn't love) but because we would have had to sell this place first we decided to pass on their counter offer.  They wanted to keep their house listed as Active instead of Contingent and I was too afraid that I would get my heart set on it and someone else would get it first.

4) I have 2, two year olds...it stinks.  It's insane and my gray hair is showing BIG time!

5) Danika will be registering for Kindergarten soon!!!  KINDERGARTEN!!!  Ack!

I'm sure that there is more that I could share but for right now the 2 year olds won't be ignored!

Have a great Monday!

Okay - so . . . I've been blogging for a while now.  I have been on Facebook for a few years.  I started tweeting on Twitter a lot more than I use to and I am now 1/2 of a NEW blogging adventure, More Than Mommies, with my friend, Christine.

So how is it that I didn't mention Nate losing his first tooth on ANY of those social media outlets?

The answer is simple . . . it happened on a Thursday when I had to work all day and then go back for Open House in the evening.  By the time I got home, it was bedtime and the tooth fairy was on her way.

The next morning, well . . . I forgot!

I forgot a big, huge momentous occasion like my firstborn son losing his very first baby tooth!  It's not like I didn't know it was coming.  It had been loose for WEEKS!  Apparently, some kid told him that if he punched him in the face his tooth would fall out.  So, the kid punched Nate in the face (I heard it was more of a tap on the chin than an actual punch in the face) and his tooth fell out.  Nate said he was so excited about his tooth falling out he didn't even tell Mr. D, his teacher, that he got punched in the face!

Here's the picture I took of him (only about 4 days later) with a big toothy (and toothless) grin -

Did you ever notice that when things start to change around you then other things follow suit and before you know it everything seems to be changing and different?

No?

Okay, maybe it's just me then but lately, there have been a ton of things changing and going on around here.

First of all, we found a house that we absolutely LOVED . . . we went as far as getting pre-approved and getting ready to draw up the papers to make our offer when we were told that someone else beat us to it. I cried - because I really did think it was the perfect house for us. Then I had a glass of Pink Zinfandel and got over it . . . kinda.  I knew going into it that I shouldn't get my hopes up too much but I was really excited about this one.

There are a few other things going on (no, I'm not pregnant) that I can't get too much into on the blog - nothing major, nothing bad, just some changes . . . and to top it all off, I've started a new "project" with my friend, Christine!

I'm really excited about it and I hope that you will all come and check it out - subscribe, friend us, find us on FB or Twitter - so that you can tell us what you think!
I'll still be blogging here at Perfecting Imperfection - but these blogs will be more like journal entries while the More Than Mommies posts will be about all kinds of things that I find interesting enough to talk about and share.  You should follow it just to read the stuff Christine writes, too - she's pretty awesome!

Hope you all had a fantastic Valentine's Day - mine was a roller coaster because Jerry got me just what I wanted but then we found out we weren't going to get the house we loved.  He did find a few other ones to look at already, though!  :)

Stop by the other blog and stick around here - I have a feeling I'm going to be writing a lot more about the adventures that are going to be coming my way!

Hoping to have another exciting (but not too exciting) weekend full of lots of laughter and smiles!

It really doesn't get any better than this.

My kids and I were hanging outside in the snow today . . . I was hanging a little differently than they were, thanks to a few too many "adult" gummy bears and Chocolate Cokes made with Chocolate Vodka and Coke.

They wanted to go outside.  We finally had enough snow that they could actually play in it.

They begged and I took an Advil.

They pleaded and I drank a glass of water.

They cried and I gave in,  put layers of clothes on them and boots, and went out with my camera.

I'm glad we went out for the hour or so we were out there.  I am glad that they had fun and I got some good pictures (and some much needed fresh air).  I'm especially glad that I wasn't "mean, hungover mama" and I got my butt moving...

Now they are back to playing Xbox and watching Nick Jr.  I am back to hydrating, although I'm feeling pretty good now...must've been the fresh air!

You may remember that I was REALLY excited last year about stumbling across and ordering my Project Life kit.  I can't find the post . . . but trust me, I was EXCITED!!!  I did awesome the first 3 months.  I took pictures, printed pictures and wrote out little journal entries for 3 months!  Then . . . I got busy and I got overwhelmed because I got behind and I kept putting it off and putting it off.

As of right now, my 2011 Project Life is a pretty cool album/scrapbook that is about 1/2 done.  I have a lot of pictures filled in (thanks to Snapfish for having their penny prints!) but not a lot of the journal cards done and I still have to fill some pictures in here and there.  I will finish it when I have time but I have a feeling that isn't going to be anytime soon.

I decided to go a different route for 2012.  I'm doing the Digital Project Life over at Shutterfly.  I'm thinking it will be a better fit for me because I can do it on the computer and don't have to drag a bunch of stuff out and then put a bunch of stuff back to get any work done on it.

Personally, I would much rather have a more tactile, unique album that is filled with ticket stubs, programs, receipts and such . . . but being practical, this is the easiest and best fit for me RIGHT NOW and I would rather have my memories preserved and the stories remembered than an unfinished product and a box of misc. memorabilia piling up.  I think I may just opt for taking pictures of those special things and then *gasp* throw them away!!!

I picked the Turquoise Edition . . . because I like brown and green.  I have the first week and a half done - and we aren't even a week and a half into January yet!!!!

Just thought I'd share - and here are some of the pictures that found their way into the first few pages:

I'm planning on having a FABULOUS New Year.  I'm not setting my expectations too high but I am hoping that we will have some big changes this year.  What I'd REALLY like to do this year is move out of this house. It's too small.  We've just outgrown it.  I'm praying hardcore about that one.

Speaking of praying, my only New Year's resolution is that I'm going to go back to church.  I am going to make it a regular thing (like it SHOULD be for us Catholics) and I'm going to make sure that my kids know it is a priority.  We made a lot of excuses the past 2 years about why we couldn't make it to church on Sundays.  The twins were the biggest excuse.  Now, I've talked to my MIL and she agreed to come and watch the boys for us Sunday mornings so that we can take Nate and Danika to church.  We went on Christmas and made it last weekend (we went Saturday night because we knew that Sunday morning would be a stretch).  I have to admit that it felt good.  I'm excited about it . . . for all of the reasons I should be but also because it means that I will be able to sit in peace and not have to worry about why a baby is crying for at least an hour.  I know that sounds a little selfish and probably not the reason I should want to go to church but hey . . . I'm being honest.  :)

I also started reading my In One Year Bible. . . don't worry, I'm not going to break into a sermon or start preaching on my blog.  It's just something that I want to be able to say that I did.  I want to be able to say that I read the bible...the whole thing.  We'll see if I can do it.  I've actually had the bible for about 2 years but happened to think of it on New Year's Day and thought that I would break it out and give it a shot.

Other than that . . . I don't really have any big plans for this year.

Moving is a priority.  So, that will be something that I really work towards.

I'm not dieting.  Not that I couldn't use a kick in the butt when it comes to my food choices but I don't have the time to put the amount of energy into it that needs to be put into it to do it right.

I'm planning on still doing my once a month cooking this year, though.  So, you can expect to hear things about that.  I'm also thinking I would like to be a little more creative in the kitchen.  Now that I have my immersion blender and Kitchen Aid mixer!

I'm also planning on trying to be a little bit more positive and focusing on what I have and not what I want.  I have a feeling if I can pull that one off I will be one of the happiest people in the world!

I have to admit that I didn't have as Merry a Christmas as I wanted.

I hate to admit it because I want appear to have that "perfect" life that I feel like I should be having but I realize that I'm not perfect and I need to stop trying so hard to be.

Jerry, the kids and I (along with my niece, Mia) and Santa

I think that my expectations of Christmas are set too high.  As an adult, Christmas just doesn't hold the same magic that it does when you are a little kid.  It is a lot of work.  It is a lot of stress.  It is a lot of planning and preparing and wrapping and packing and praying. Even when you have all that done perfectly, you can't control the things that you have no control over - like how long mass will last or which of your 2 year old sons will scream his head off because he would rather eat chocolate than Christmas dinner.  Oddly enough, I think I handled those things pretty well . . . I'm not sure why I felt so down on Christmas Day, but it was a lot worse than I would have EVER expected it to be.

I made sure that the kids had a Merry Christmas and even Jerry had one!  They LOVE the X-Box 360 and Kinect.  (I LOVE watching them play with them!!!  It's hysterical! Jerry is in his GLORY playing Halo again!)  It really is great to give to others and I'm so glad that they had an amazing Christmas!

I'm not sure why that didn't make me ecstatic.  I loved seeing their faces Christmas morning!  I loved hearing the laughs, squeals and giggles.  I loved hearing how happy they were!  (Except Danika . . . she told me Santa didn't understand her because she said she wanted a BARBIE doll house not a regular doll house.  :)

Then it was over.  The over part of it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks.  That, and the fact that I forgot to take my "happy pills" for 2 days in a row because I was too tired to remember and too busy to realize I forgot, made for a weepy, stressed out, puffy eyed me at Christmas dinner.

I'm better now.  I'm actually really excited about the new year and plan on taking it on full force with a whole new plan/outlook on how to get things done!!!  I'm not going to set myself up for disappointment but I have high hopes for this new year!

Hope you all had a Merry Christmas!

You may remember when I talked about the whining problem we have at our house and how I was hoping to find something to fix it.  It's not that I have horrible children.  They are genuinely good kids and usually know how to behave but the CONSTANT whining and fighting is KILLING me!!!

I know they are cute:














but I still wanted some help getting them in shape a bit.

During my search, I stumbled upon the book:

Have a New Kid by Friday by Dr. Kevin Leman (click on the link for the GoodReads page with some review)

and have to say that I've already found the first chapter (titled: Monday) inspirational . . . as well as practical and kind of common sense.  Although I already knew a lot of the things I read in the book (I haven't started Tuesday, yet) I feel like I need a little bit of support putting some of the things into practice.  It's a lot easier to say you are not going to give in than it is to really stand your ground and NOT give the wailing 4 year old "just one piece of candy" before dinner. . . especially, when you have her 2, 2 year old, brothers wailing behind her.

However, Dr. Leman makes a point that I already know . . . if I'm consistent and stand my ground then I will only have to fight a few battles rather than battle with them my whole life.  They will know that I mean business.  

I also love that he talks about how it isn't REALLY our job to make our children happy ALL the time.  It is actually okay for them to be upset, disappointed, angry or even a little bit sad.  I hate to see my children that way, but I also know that life isn't going to always be there to protect and provide for them like Jerry and I do. That doesn't mean I'm going to make them start paying rent right now or make their own dinners but it does mean that they will be responsible for consequences of their actions.  (It also means there will be a lot of crying, fighting and screaming while we try to revamp our parenting style and put some of this into play. . . . good thing aspirin was on sale at GE a few weeks ago and I stocked up!)

So, today's little experiment ended up being with Danika.  Here's how it went...

Me:  Danika, can you please get me 2 diapers so that I can change your brothers and get them down for their nap?

Danika:  Can't you get them yourself?  You always ask me to do everything.

Me:  So, you are telling me that you won't get the diapers for me and that you don't want to help me anymore?  How would you feel if I didn't help you anymore?

Danika:  You just want me to get the diapers.  Why don't you just go get them?

Me:  Okay, but then the next time you ask for my help I am going to tell you no.

Danika: Fine.

So, I went and got the diapers and changed the boys.  I put them down for their nap and went into the kitchen for a drink.  Danika followed me with the remote control.

Danika:  I want to watch Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

Me:  Go ahead. (as I mosey on up to my laptop and pull out my chair)

Danika:  I need you to turn it on for me.

Me:  Can't you do it yourself?

Danika:  No.

Me:  Hmm...maybe you should have thought of that before you said you couldn't help me with the diapers.  Sorry.

What followed was kind of cool.  Danika looked shocked and kind of hurt (okay, I'm not saying that seeing my daughter hurt was fun).  Then, she started to cry a little . . . but it wasn't the big sobs that she usually throws at me when she wants something and doesn't get her way.  This time, it was kind of like a "I know I screwed up" whimper.  She went into the living room and found something else to do and Rudolph still isn't on.

Do I think I won that one?  Not necessarily...we will have to see what happens.  It will depend on if she will help me the next time I need something or not.  I will say that it felt good to set a consequence and follow through with it, though.  It was so immediate that I know she understood.

I'll keep you posted and am hoping to read Tuesday later tonight!  :)

It's almost (but not quite) a month since I've posted a blog post . . . and I really, truly have missed blogging.  I could try to make excuses for why I haven't blogged and blame my kids . . . they have been SICK SICK SICK for the past month or so.  They were even kind enough to pass the sickness on to me so that I had to spend Thanksgiving Eve praying to the porcelain god.  (I remember Thanksgiving Eves of the past where I also said a few prayers to that deity, but this was no where near as much fun beforehand).

I could blame it on that . . . but I also could have gotten my butt to my laptop a few days after being sick and just jotted a post or two.  The truth is, I just haven't "felt" it lately.  I haven't been myself lately.  I have been more stressed out than usual and a lot more scatterbrained.

The twins have been horrific when I'm home alone with them - they've been pretty horrific when Jerry is home with me, too...however, they seem to be really happy when I'm not around.  I'm starting to get a complex about it.  The thing is, they want my attention all to themselves and when I try to make breakfast, lunch, heat up dinner, sit down at my laptop or start to clip some coupons they go NUTS!  They want to be on my lap, they want to see what I'm doing and they want to help.  It's exhausting and frustrating.

Here's just a few of the things you missed around here!

• Thanksgiving went really well after I was done throwing up...here's a picture (NOT of me throwing up)                                                                                                                                                                                         
• I'm done Christmas shopping - well . . . that's not 100% true, I still have to go and buy stuff to put in the kids stockings.  The major stuff is taken care of and I've already WRAPPED everything, too!!!
• Tinsel and Holly (our Magic Elf elves) have been up to their old tricks again...the kids seem less excited about it this year but still run downstairs EVERY morning to see what Tinsel and Holly did that night.  Here's some of my favorites:

The last two days have actually been pretty good days. Yesterday, we took all 4 kids to the mall and then to my SIL's house for dinner. The kids had a blast and were pretty happy - for the most part. The twins still had their "we're 2" moments but they were mostly short lived.

Today, I think they were happy to be home! We did a lot of snuggling and we watched a lot of tv. I didn't get on my laptop until after 2 o'clock!!

While dinner was cooking the twins and Danika were sitting in a row sharing some Fritos, laughing and watching a movie. It was adorable. That's what I want to remember about today. Not that 15 minutes later there were Fritos all over the living room and no one ate dinner because of how many Fritos they ate - I just want to remember how adorable they were while they were laughing and sharing. :)

Today, I went to my SIL's house for dinner today and helped her son, Lochlin, with his homework assignment to disguise a turkey so that it wouldn't be noticed at Thanksgiving.

Here's what it looked like when we were done:

Dear Nate,

Happy 6th Birthday!  I can't believe it was 6 years ago that you were born.  I remember so much about that time and yet, it seems so much LONGER than 6 years ago!  If anyone would have told me that you would have a sister and 2 brothers by the time you were 4, I would have told them they were NUTS!  But . . . here we are and you are an awesome big brother!


This year was a BIG year for you (and me).  It was the first time I actually sent you to school instead of having you in school with me.  I knew you were ready.  I knew you were going to do great and that you needed to kind of spread your wings a tiny bit and do something on your own - you are awesome at it, by the way.  I will say, though, that I missed you as soon as I put you on the bus and it was probably one of the longest days of my life until you stepped off the bus at 3:29.

Now, we are both old pros!  I still love the fact that you want me to get out of the car and actually walk you to the corner when we drive...it reminds me that you still need me.  I also love the days when PapPap comes and sits with the other kids and I walk down to get you at the bus stop because you hold my hand the whole way home. We don't really get too much time just the 2 of us anymore and I love that 5 minute walk!

You are also getting to be so smart!  You surprise me everyday by the things you know and how well you can read things.  I will tell you - I am probably going to have to be more on my toes because you are starting to know the words I spell to Nana on the phone and you can read things I leave up on my laptop.  I'm so proud of you.

You are still a very sensitive little boy.  I worry sometimes that people will hurt your feelings and I really do want to protect you from that but I also know that you are a strong and sensitive little boy and you will have no problem taking care of yourself.  I love that you decided that you wanted to keep up with ice skating and hockey . . . I know you will get better at it with practice and baseball season is coming up again, too!!!

Thank you so much for being such a wonderful son!  You really are amazing and I've learned so much being your mom.  You taught me how to be a mom!  You are a great role model for your brothers and sister and we all love you so much!

Now, you HAVE to stop leaving your shoes and socks in the middle of the floor and put your clothes in the hamper at night and you will be perfect!  hehehe

I love you,
Mama

Tomorrow my first born will be turning 6. I remember so much about the time when he was first born and brand new. I can't believe he's growing so fast - fast enough to come off the school bus wearing this crown from his teacher. I love that he still had it in getting off the bus and didn't just shove it in his backpack. He is truly an awesome kid!

I may have vented a little bit about how much earlier the Christmas season seems to be starting lately.  Honestly . . . I thought my husband was lying when he said that 99.7 was already doing their 24 hours a day Christmas Music thing.  He wasn't.  The kids and I listened to Harry Connick Jr. singing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer on the way home from Nana's tonight - I figured it would quiet them down.  It did.

Growing up an Errico, I have always been a pretty big believer in the "Christmas DOESN'T start until AFTER Santa shows up in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade" and now that I'm a Krajci, I also believe that it requires a viewing of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation after dinner on Thanksgiving to really get going.

So, needless to say, when a small group of my preschoolers started singing Jingle Bells this afternoon I kind of cringed.  Then I gasped and said, "Noooo ~ it's not time to sing Jingle Bells, yet!!!"  Of course, preschoolers find this reaction hysterical and a cue to sing louder and get the rest of the preschoolers involved.  :)  If you ask them, their teacher is a riot.

I will say one thing, though.  The appearance of the Christmas Carols this early and the energy that the kids had today made me VERY happy that we only have 5 days of school (because we are Tuesday/Thursday only) in December!!!  These kids are so excited ALREADY!!!  You would think that they are going to get a bunch of presents or something!  hehehe  (FYI . . . it isn't too early for ME to start counting the days until Christmas Vacation . . . if they can start Christmas Carols, I can start counting down!)

I looked into how to get my kiddos to start acting the way I want them to act today.  Of course, I don't have unrealistic expectations that I'm going to have 4 perfect children.  What family have you ever heard of that has 4 perfect children?  Even the Brady Bunch had Jan . . . and in the movie she was positively creepy.

I do know that I am going to have to get a little bit more organized and active with my children if I'm going to get them to where I want them, though.  I'm guessing by what I read today that this is going to be a long search.  I'm not going to find the perfect thing to change my crazy kids the very first day that I try.  Instead, I'm going to have to really research to find something that fits our family and our current situation.

Like I said, I'm aiming for the beginning of January to really start something - so I have the time to prep and research.

I think the first thing that I need to do is really think about what it is that I want my children to do differently.  Just saying, "I want them to stop driving me crazy" isn't going to cut it.  So, Baby Step #1 is going to be coming up with some goals that I want to achieve...then I will have to look into the best way to achieve them.

I found this article on 15 Secrets of Happy Families

Here are 3 that I'm going to start trying to incorporate right away:

Break Bread Together -We tried this in the past and it was disastrous.  The babies just don't seem to want to eat in the dining room with the rest of us...know why?  Because I haven't made a point to make them...I think this is going to change in the upcoming weeks.

Build and Honor Rituals - we have a lot of things that we do . . . but none on a regular basis or with any kind of schedule.  I think I'm going to come up with a few things that we do a few times a week just to help us develop rituals we have as a family...and then those will become priorities - above anything else that may come up and try to get in the way.

Encourage Sibling Harmony - I think this is something I'm going to start doing now . . . really stressing how lucky they are to have each other.  It isn't always easy for them to see.  When Dean and David wreck a Lego masterpiece that Nate had been working on, I practically see the steam coming out of his ears.  Luckily, he doesn't go after the babies because he knows they are babies.  I have to work on somehow getting him to realize that he is lucky to have a baby brother (or 2) who will do that and annoy him.  :)

Okay - that's enough to think about tonight!  More tomorrow!  :)